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    最新整人短信

    時間:2018-06-25 19:49:31  分類:搞笑短信  閱讀:

    你望著自己的玉手點綴著金黃的色彩,內心感覺怎能用語言形容?嬌羞的小臉泛著淡淡紅暈,想起剛剛發生的事,心中說:為什么擦屁股總是把手紙弄破呢?

    那個夏日的午后,我帶你走進青紗帳。太陽高高地照著,微風撩起我的衣衫,我們一起度過了美好的下午:你低頭吃草,我看小人書!

    人人愛上你是因為你身上繼承了東方女人傳統的優點:一美麗二善良三賢惠四勤勞五溫柔六純潔七樸實八端莊。為了突出你的優點,所以大家都喜歡叫你:八婆!

    現在的我好亂……心里不知道在想些什么……整個人都快被煩死了……我真的不知道要怎么辦?你能不能告訴我……我真的不知道要吃拉面還是炸醬面啊!

    為了鞏固我們的友誼,拉近東西部差距,抑制貧富懸殊,杜絕社會分化,穩定社會治安,推動有中國特色社會主義現代化建設……借我兩百塊!

    為什么給你發信息,因為不想見你。為什么不想見你,因為不敢看你的臉。為什么不敢看你的臉,因為昨天剛吐完。

    我的心里很難過,我的眼淚流成河,我的人品也不錯,為什么你愛別人不愛我,我親愛的人民幣!

    夜,已經很深了,我從睡夢中醒來,因為我想起了你,為什么你總是在深夜的時候悄然離我而去,我真的很需要你,咳,枕頭又掉哪兒去了?

    聽說你的手機沒有短信功能,所以發這條短信試驗。如果你收到,證實有短信功能并是我的短信,請給我回復:我有了,是你的!

    當你默默離開我時,我痛苦萬分,不知如何是好,看著你的背影遠去,我恨自己,都是我的錯…早起一點就趕上車了。

    愿幸福像狗皮膏藥粘你不掉,好運像狗屎被你經常踩到,快樂像蒼蠅嗡嗡圍你繞,財富像垃圾你隨便撿到,意外像老鼠總讓你尖叫!

    上帝送我個寶盆。我不小心想了你一次,它就變出一個你,我止不住想,它就止不住變。最后滿屋都是你,我愁了:這都成驢圈了。

    近日武林大亂,系屠龍寶刀重現江湖,血流成河,武林俠士奔走相告,欲求閣下臉皮制成寶盾,以救萬民于水火!

    你長得很抽象!你長得很朦朧!你長得很模糊!你長得很……詭異啊!饒了我吧,我實在描繪不出你的樣子,我真沒見過鬼。

    電話留言:先不要說話,我猜出你是誰了,其實我有三個字一直想對你說,又怕說了連朋友都沒的做,但今天我一定要說:請掛機!

    發這條信息給你并沒有什么特別的意思,其目的只不過是想消耗你手機的一點點電力而已。

    山谷里傳來你動人的聲音,我往下眺望,是你!真的是你!你和一老翁在一起,我激動地跑下去說:大爺,借你的驢用用行嗎?


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